Winging It as a Single Father: How Did I Get Here?
Becoming a single parent was not part of my long-term life plan, and I would venture to say that most single mothers and fathers would agree, but like I always say, “We all have a story.”
Becoming a single parent was not part of my long-term life plan, and I would venture to say that most single mothers and fathers would agree, but like I always say, “We all have a story.”
In the early seventies, Barry Williams became acutely aware, as a single father to four young children, including a 13-month-old baby, of the lack of support for men and fathers. His lifelong advocacy for single parents and their children has been phenomenal.
My name is Wayne Butler. I have known and worked with Barry Williams, the founder of the Lone Fathers Association, since 2001. Please find my video tribute to my dear friend and colleague Barry Williams here below.
I want to get as many quality years and moments as I can with my daughter. I don’t want to live in pain if I don’t have to, because it impedes my ability to enjoy her and being a parent.
Just because your circumstances have changed doesn’t mean you can’t still leave a strong legacy to your children. In fact, you may have an even greater opportunity now. Adversity, if approached right, can reap great rewards.
I don’t think God’s plan stipulated that children were supposed to live apart from their fathers – but this is what’s happening all over the world. So, I wrote a poem that I hope will raise awareness of this injustice, that I hope will make a change.
If a father had done what the mother in the story below did, there would have been a police chase, which would have been on the nightly news. The headline would have been ‘Criminal Father Abducts Daughters’.
Due to the inaction of the Family Court in enforcing court orders and punishing contravention of court orders, they have aided the parental alienation and psychological abuse which my sons are experiencing from their mother.
My role in their lives wasn’t exactly the same, but I realised that I was just as valuable — if not more so — than I was before. My worth had nothing to do with the ‘single’ and everything to do with the ‘dad’.
Maybe you never asked to be a single dad, but there is much joy ahead with your kids if you can navigate these tricky waters well. You’re not alone. Not by a long shot.