Happy Father’s Day: Dads, You Matter
Fathers shape families in countless ways, offering strength, guidance, protection and love while building a legacy that can bless generations to come.
Defeating Dad-Hating Divorce Courts
Divorce courts hate dads. There is no nicer way of saying it. As if the lack of charitable support for fathers separated from their kids wasn’t punishment enough. Partiality towards women in matters of divorce is wounding already-wounded men. Designed to reign in deadbeat dads, the system ends up beating ...
Being a 100% Dad
Once upon a not-so-long-ago-time, I wasn’t a single dad. I was just a dad. Well, not “just”. For a just-starting-out dad, I had set some parenting goals. I quite deliberately set out to be anything but “just a dad.” I had a profound sense of parenting purpose. I was pounding ...
Copycat Kids
A few years back I let go of a muffled swear word after pacing mile after frustrating mile of city blocks with my daughters looking for smart black flats that bucked the trend of imitation tramp. Ever alert to any parental blemish that might be used as evidence against me, ...
Time and Space
Bill runs his own business devoted to strengthening the relationship between children and parents. He artfully taps into the desire children and parents have for wholehearted connectedness. Bill simply prompts parents to maintain time and space in the relationship schedule for it to thrive. Bill shares with his parent and ...
Parenting Balancing Act
I am amused by the serious instruction of friends, “Do what you love and what feels right for you.” Their career counselling advice amuses me because they haven’t regarded that what I love and what feels right can sometimes yell wildly at each other in conflict. In the red corner, ...
Easter Musing
This year I am grateful that the Easter Bunny won’t be stopping by. The shambolic mess that the break‑and‑enter bunny left last year has left me thankful for a reprieve. There are many things that I celebrate at Easter… family traditions, the ceremony and stories of Easter accounts and the ...
The Emotions of Parenting
I am Joy. I am the happy-go-lucky character that sets out to stir my children into happiness when Sadness mopes forlornly into their day. I parent to have my daughters be afflicted with my happy contagion. That was before the Joy character of the Inside Out movie set me to ...
How Present Am I?
Sometimes on the other side of a wonderful parenting weekend, there is a sense that single parenting is a clock-on-clock-off thing. A full parenting weekend involves the tumble and fun and out of sorts and homework and silliness and around-the-house helping out. Then, it goes quiet when I mentally punch ...
Colour Me Happy
Sometimes my weekends are a maddening tussle to make the one-after-the-other events that seem to start flooding our Friday and spill into our Saturday and Sunday. Sport, birthday parties, youth group, housework, homework, school socials all back up, one against the other, to make our dad and daughters time fairly ...
Backyard Dads
“Inaugurated in 1957, the Australian Father of the Year has been awarded annually to high-profile, famous fathers, from prime ministers and politicians to sportsmen, business leaders, entertainers and musicians acknowledging the support, guidance and love they show to Australian children.” So says Wikipedia. I am not famous or high-profile. The ...
Family Law Reform Fiasco – Rearranging the Deck Chairs on the Titanic
The proposed Family Law Amendment legislation by the Labor Government will be another case of rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic, instead of fixing the hole in the hull to stop the ship from going down. Many of the reform proposals, such as considering the best interests of the ...
The Best Things About Being a Single Dad
A few weeks ago, on an impulse and wanting to share a snapshot of my post-separation status, I wrote a part-whimsical, part-serious piece about the worst parts of being a single dad. By implication, if some parts are worst, then there must be some best bits, says my cerebral dialogue. ...
Dads ‘Cut Out’ in Changes to Law
Family law expert Patrick Parkinson says Labor’s proposal to amend the Family Law Act is a radical change that will take Australia back to when mothers were granted primacy in custody battles. The results for dads will be devastating.
Winner Takes All
This week a television crew from the Japanese public broadcaster came to Sydney to interview family law specialist Justin Dowd, a former President of the NSW Law Society. Japan is considering a move away from mum-custody towards “joint parental authority” -- which recognises that it’s in the best interests of ...
The Worst Things About Being a Single Dad
I separated from my ex-wife a few years ago. I think that it was five years ago. It could have been six. On reflection, the first six months seemed like six years. During the frenzied rush of committing to a rental and buying a car and purchasing beds for my ...
Empty Days, Lonely Nights
By Bettina Arndt -- The Sydney Morning Herald, April 28, 2014 A belief that children under three should not stay overnight with their separated or divorced father has underpinned our family law system for years. Has it all been a mistake? Bettina Arndt reports. Editor’s Note: Little has changed in ...
What is the Lesson of a Dad in a Onesie?
Toileting is pitiful in a onesie! And so, they are not the usual garb of this practical single dad, but for a social experiment that I crafted to play out. I cannot conceive that a bedtime costume as impractical as a onesie would ever be engineered for anything more than ...
My Annual Dad Superpower Check-up
Visiting the dentist has all the appeal of cleaning my daughters’ long, clagged hair out of the shower drain. I visit annually because it is the right thing to do. Each visit follows a predictable pattern. I arrive early at the clinic. I eagerly anticipate being able to read a ...
The School Holiday Tumble
School holidays shared with my daughters ought to be a fun time. I have a notion that the week-long blocks of time I share with my daughters during school holidays should be blissful. Yet, day three into the week with my daughters, and I was terrified as my racing-harness chair ...
Dear Journal
Dad’s log. Day 3 of our 8-day expedition of exploration… my crew of two settled excitedly into their temporary resort environment. Their sense of holiday time gives them cause to make the argument that five serves of vegetable and two of fruit does not apply. “But, Daa-aad… it’s holidays… we ...
Parental Alienation is Child Abuse
Parental alienation is a systemic plague infecting the family court system. Inoculating the courts against this would clear the emotional quagmire brought on by The Court of Emotion’s atrocious toxic waiting queue in a matter of months. Not only this, the disproportionately high suicide rate among men, as well as ...
The Popular Girl
Taylor is the popular girl at my daughters’ all-girl school. All schools have popular kids. This popular girl holds some sort of easy charm, often leaving some girls pining for that social standing. Normally I wouldn’t be too fussed about the popular girl; however, I believe that Taylor is stepping ...
Finding Independence for My Daughters
I hold a lofty ideal for my daughters. Lofty and simple. I want them to be sure in believing that they are wholesome people of value, who can tend generously to others and themselves. If I am doing well as a mindful dad, then I am setting my daughters up ...
Christmas for My Daughters
Joe is a mate of mine. “Mate” hardly describes our connection, yet the sporadic contact belies a relationship that holds strong meaning for me. Joe is pretty much anonymous to most, but that is of his own making. He is humble at a time when indulgence and opulence seemed to ...
Where Wonderful Went
I am more than a little miffed at Myer. Before I realised that I was watching an ad, the baited opening line invited, “Ever wonder where wonderful went?” and my drifting mind was hooked. I had been suckered into a wistful memory of the wonder of my own childhood. “When ...
