The culture of your family will be based on 3 things: What you allow What you don’t allow What you demonstrate/how you live your life I know what you’re thinking: that is way too simple, and way too obvious. Yes! Just the way I like things. At least when things are simple, I can pretend to understand most of them. Although these 3 elements are simple and seem obvious, the number ...
A concerned mother reflects on how she can best protect her young sons from the lure of internet pornography. I don’t have a blueprint for this brave new online world, where just typing ‘breastfeeding’ into a search engine produces a minefield of lurid possibilities. Steve Biddulph, author of Raising Boys and Raising Girls, wrote an article in the Sydney Morning Herald that really resonated with me. He highlighted the fact that ...
How can a man kill his own beloved son? The murder of Luke Batty by his divorced father remains a haunting horror to this day. Yet, Luke's mother Rosie recognised her ex-husband's genuine affection for his son in happier times. On 12 February 2014, Luke Batty was killed by his own father. The event shocked me deeply at the time as a father. For many weeks after the event, I asked ...
Prioritising your spouse, especially in the little daily routines, teaches your children how to respect and honour their mother. My wife and I were fortunate enough to be volunteers for the Guide Dogs for the Blind organisation in our local state after all our kids had grown up and left school. Over a period of seven years, we had the pleasure (and to be honest at times the displeasure) of raising ...
If your child is angry, neither lashing out or bottling it up is a good idea. Here are eight great anger busters to help your child manage his or her emotions. Your child is yelling, slamming doors and having an all-out tantrum – but can he trust you with his anger? Punishing the behaviours associated with anger might be a quick fix, but without instruction, your child will lose out. National ...
What’s the Difference Between Respect and Cherishment? While everyone experiences love uniquely, some clear gender patterns have emerged through relationship research. In one study, when given the option between the negative choices of being ‘alone and unloved in all the world’ or ‘inadequate and disrespected by everyone’, 74% of men preferred being alone and unloved, compared to only a minority of women.* Further enquiry suggests that this gender pattern is relevant ...
It was a sunny Saturday morning; I was dining alfresco at a restaurant on a busy street, casually sipping my coffee, when I noticed a little girl wander past our table and down the street. Her mother was deep in conversation and didn’t notice. I didn’t want to cause alarm by yelling at her to watch her child from across the busy tables, so I walked toward the little girl. She ...
Not all TV dads are the same. Take examples like Tim Allen’s sharp-witted Mike Baxter, and contrast him with Matt Groening’s, feckless Homer Simpson. Forget for a moment that we’re talking about cartoon vs. human. In any greatest-dad-of-all-time celebrity boxing match, we know Baxter would win. The outdoor man vs. the “Duff” guzzling, obese, inattentive, drooling, lounge lizard. A father with strength, humility, and a no-nonsense embrace of free speech, up ...
“As iron sharpens iron so does the face of a man’s friend,” is a saying from the book of Proverbs. It really sums up the mysterious masculine healing power that is released when men gather together for a noble purpose. I have experienced this mysterious force in men’s gatherings at so many different levels and in so many different ways, for the last 40 years. I just love it when men ...
Anyone who has been a father and then a stepfather knows that they aren’t the same. While many aspects of these two roles are similar, it is the unique ones that lead to disillusionment. Franklin put it this way: “I’ve been to every Promise Keepers conference and I’ve studied fathering with my men’s group many times. But nothing has prepared me for being a stepfather. With my own kids I have a ...
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