God’s wisdom and plans are greater than ours. It is tempting to chart our children’s lives for them, but even better is when we let God take the wheel – directing our lives and our children’s lives too. Do you already have the “perfect” plan designed for your children’s lives? As parents, I believe this is a particularly difficult area to manoeuvre. Wanting the very best for our children, we can ...

What do your children value? Reflecting on the way children treasure the simplest things can teach us important lessons in life about what we treasure. My girls are obsessed with little bits and pieces. Their bits and pieces might be a compilation of parts from toys, Barbie accessories, bracelets or plastic jewellery. They love anything little. It’s the kind of stuff that I would call junk, but my Esther and Magdalene ...

I am thankful for my “deadbeat” dad and encouraged by his example. Why? Because his mistakes have taught me what not to do as a father! Among the most inspirational figures in my life – who encourages my parenting style and has a significant impact on me – is my “deadbeat” dad. He wasn’t a successful father, but his failures have helped me try and avoid failures of my own. I ...

An open letter to kids church leaders: you are doing more for our children than you realise. Praise God for your ministry! For 15 years, I’ve served in kids church or children’s ministry at different churches and denominations. During that time, I worked almost solely with 2-4 year olds. Through those years, I wondered about the impact it had on their lives – if any – apart from providing a child-free ...

The question of identity — who am I? — is a huge one in society today. When everything is stripped away, what makes us, us? I went to a retreat once where the director used a reflection that stuck in my mind and bugged me for ages as I tried to work out what he meant. Who Am I? He asked us to imagine ourselves as a boat floating down a ...

What do the first man to run a sub-4 minute mile and an 85-year-old man who hit rock bottom following a family tragedy have in common? Answer: they both opened the door for future generations to walk through, and left for themselves a lasting life purpose. Read on and listen to their story in this latest blogpost & podcast. Do you wonder if your life will have a lasting life purpose? ...

Are you skilled at resolving conflict where there are multiple personalities and vested interests? Real men need to be peacemakers. Listen in episode 11 to expert Brian Noble on how to resolve conflict in a group setting. Resolving Conflict In A Group Setting Do you have the skills to resolve conflict at work, in your church, or in committees or other groups? How can you stop tension from becoming outright conflict? ...

Life is getting more complex, and decision-making under uncertainty is getting harder. As real men, how do we approach important decisions without being paralysed by worry over the outcome? That is the topic of this week’s podcast. My teens like the privileges that come with getting older. But one thing they don’t tend to like is the increased stress they feel with having to make ever more important decisions. They have ...

How is it that despite looking like we have the things we need, we are unhappy, frustrated, even angry? As the world looks to behavioural change programs to deal with tragedies like domestic violence, Guy argues that perhaps, for men who are at risk of ‘snapping’, an answer is more deeply hidden but oh so easy to get. Meet Jim I want to introduce you to Jim. Jim is the unhappiest ...

I don’t know how many times I have looked at the clock since becoming a mum and have willed those handles to spin a little faster. There have been many a day when I have wished for nap time to come sooner and for bedtime to be brought forward. I’ve always contemplated why time feels like it goes forever when stopping and playing with kids on the floor, yet when life ...

Dr. Seuss said, “The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you’ll go.” This famous children’s book author was certainly across his subject. Here are 10 good reasons why you should read to your children. Hopefully you are inspired. 1. Dads Bring Something Special to the Reading Equation. Harvard-trained Dr Elisabeth Duursma said, “In most families, mothers are the ones ...

Dear God, help me to write when I am looking at an empty page. Dear God, help me to be a better person, a better father, a better friend, a better husband. Dear God, help me to become whom You want me to be. Dear God, help me to like Spongebob Squarepants reruns.   Dear God, help me not to get cranky when my daughter leaves a mess wherever she goes. ...

When a crisis hits you out of nowhere, what do you do next? When Guy faced nearly losing a child, he learned 13 lessons before the crisis was even over. Sometimes in life you have experiences that profoundly and permanently change you. Experiences either solidify your existing beliefs, assumptions and expectations, or they challenge and change what you thought you knew. Some are so small you don’t even notice them. Some ...

How close are you to burning out? Could you recognise the signs? What will the consequences be if you did burn out? In episode 44 of Real Talk 4 Real Men, Guy and Chris unpack how you can guard against burnout. As I sat on the last train of the night home from another exhausting and stressful day at the office, my brain continued to race as I reflected on the ...

Today, Chris and Guy answer the question: what is really involved in being a father in a child’s world? Episode #31 of Real Talk 4 Real Men. When you became a daddy, did you think that being a father was something just so natural, you didn’t really need to think very much about it? That was Chris’ experience more than four decades ago, but he had to learn the hard way ...

Editor’s Note: This is a profoundly real and self-revelatory article for those fathers who are grappling with the deeper issues of fatherhood. Full congratulations to Rod Lampard for sharing his journey with us. This is a case of strong meat for strong men. ___ “You’re just like your father.” This was the fictional narrative of my formative years. Instead of using my name when things got heated between us, my family ...

Thanks so much for all the wonderful help with the End of Financial Year ‘Help the Children’ Appeal. Your giving will help Dads4Kids to keep going. The good news is, we are just over halfway to our target. I am sure we will get there in the end, but it just might take a bit more time. If you would still like to support the Dads4Kids Help Children Appeal, please DONATE ...

Arguably, the most intelligent thing any real man should be doing is caring for his wife. In this short post, Guy outlines 7 easy things you can do today to love your wife and improve your life. I’ve heard it said that a man’s wife is his glory.  Another version often stated is “happy wife, happy life”. Proverbs 12:4a outlines it a slightly different way: “A virtuous [or in some translations: ...

Gratitude now has a voice. We as fathers need to be encouraged to be thankful, so we can encourage our children to be the same. Thankful people are happy people. Thankful families are happy families. I even try to teach this to myself, but some things are better caught than taught! When my friend Mark Powell sent me the video below, I nearly leapt out of my skin with excitement. Mark ...

Anyone who has been a father and then a stepfather knows that they aren’t the same. While many aspects of these two roles are similar, it is the unique ones that lead to disillusionment. Franklin put it this way: “I’ve been to every Promise Keepers conference and I’ve studied fathering with my men’s group many times. But nothing has prepared me for being a stepfather. With my own kids I have a ...