In a fast-paced world, our attention is a rare and valuable commodity. Is your marriage suffering from attention deficiency? True confession: some evenings you’ll find us sitting on the couch with the TV playing, and us both on our laptops or other individual devices. We know — it’s not particularly noble and we have a sense of unease with it. But truly, movies and TV simply don’t seem to hold our ...

Want to know the easiest way to give your kids a confidence boost? It’s the most sure-fire simple way to increase your child’s positivity and resilience. Here it is… Enjoy them. Spend time with them. Let go of your agenda and be with them and listen to them. That’s it. Presence Taking the time to savour the moments we have with them — to really enjoy our kids — is something ...

There’s an old adage in the world of parenting advice: Kids spell LOVE as T.I.M.E. Kids don’t need things nearly much as they need a parent’s attention and availability. It’s a classic mistake that we make all too often; we give them stuff we’ve bought instead of the thing they most need from us — our interest and investment in them. Or we do things for them instead of with them ...

We have all no doubt heard the statistics regarding separation and divorce in this country — something like 30% of marriages end in divorce, and a huge number of Australian children are forced to cope with life after marital breakdown. The typical divorce scenario in Australia today is that mum gets custody of the children and dad (hopefully) gets access and an obligation to pay Child Support. Children from broken marriages ...

Quality time together is ideal to keep the spark alive in a marriage, but it needs to be bolstered by “quantity-time”, making the effort to do routine things together, being comfortable in each other’s company and sharing everyday moments. With Valentine’s Day approaching, couples everywhere are looking for ways to mark the day with romance. From lovestruck dating couples to couples stressed out with kids, every one of us struggles to ...

Orlando Battista said, “The best inheritance a parent can give his children is a few minutes of his time each day.” Orlando Battista is right. Our children don’t want things, they want us.  The team at our friends at the Fathering Centre in Kansas City USA had this to say in an article titled, “Kids Say THIS Is the Best Way to Be a Better Dad”. “As is often the case, ...

Do you find yourself finishing others’ sentences, pigeonholing people, speaking over them, or multitasking when others are speaking to you? If so, then perhaps it is listening reset time… Would you call yourself a good listener?  Most people would answer positively to that question — but when those who know you are asked that question, will their answer be as positive? From Zero To Listening Hero Real Talk 4 Real Men ...

One of my most favourite things of all time is when one or both of our boys have a day out with dad. Partly because it means I get a day out with myself that usually consists chocolate, girly movies and/or pampering, but also because I notice a distinct difference in my boys every time they return. As if they’ve grown up a little bit, and for the next few days, ...

Dad-life involves both being and doing. In a word, fatherhood is a vocation. The Latin equivalent is vocare — “to call.” Dad-life is therefore a “calling.” It’s much more than just another job. For sure, fatherhood is full-time work. We’re required to be on the scene until the good Lord retires us. This will mean being waste-deep in the complexity of relationships. Wading through life’s trenches carrying responsibility and commitment, regardless ...

“In family life, be completely present,” is a saying of Lao Tzu from 600 BC. Here we are now, 2600 years later, and we are still struggling to learn this simple but profound piece of advice. This advice is all the more critical for fathers, and even more critical for fathers living in the twenty-first century. Dr Justin Coulson has written a book on parenting titled: “What your child needs from ...

Some time ago, I wrote an article called “Ten Reasons for Eating Together” for the Dads4Kids weekly newsletter to inspire fathers and encourage families. The week after the story went out to 5,000 fathers, I spoke to my wife about the newsletter. I said, “You know, a lot of men are going to start eating more with their families after last week’s newsletter — 10 Reasons for Eating Together, but not ...

Some time ago I went on a retreat with a group of men.  One of the subjects for discussion was the place of our families in our lives.  Most of the men were professional, ‘middle management’, if there is such a thing.  Most of us felt the intense pressure of ‘trying to keep the customer satisfied’.  Many had put their careers in front of their children and their families.  Others seemed ...