What don’t you understand? I am a dad. I love my kids. Just because my marriage is failing, instead of help, as a male, I feel persecuted! I am doing the right thing. My wife and I have parted company. Sadly, the person I thought was my life partner is no longer such. But I still love my kids. Why am I denied the right to have a relationship with them?

What don’t you understand? As a dad, it only takes one unproven accusation, and I am relegated to either no contact or supervised contact in a relationship centre with every move monitored by strangers. Do you know how belittling that is? Not just to me, but my kids. I understand if I have done something wrong, but I haven’t. I am just at the mercy of an angry spouse who sees the only way of getting revenge is to deny me the right to see my own kids. My wife has a new partner living in the house. He gets unsupervised contact with my kids, as much as he likes. I don’t know him. I, as their father, have no control whatsoever. Is he a good man?

What don’t you understand? The relationship centres are overloaded. It can take months just to see my kids, and they charge such exorbitant fees that I cannot afford. I have just lost my job through all of this. I have lost my home. I am struggling, living in a small camper. They won’t let me have the kids because I don’t have a bedroom for them, and I don’t have a toilet for them. What am I supposed to do?

What don’t you understand? I have been paying my child support. Do you know that just listing that basically cancels out any chance of moving forward? I can’t replace the family home. I can’t even get a loan for a car because my child support obligations put me below the income threshold. How am I supposed to rebuild my life? How am I supposed to show my kids I am not a deadbeat dad, but a dad who loves them so much?

What don’t you understand? Where is my help? Is it any wonder I may join the 47 males a week who decide to get off the merry-go-round? I want to be relevant in my kids’ lives, and while I understand you think you are protecting them, I am becoming a distant memory. You are destroying relationships through the Family circus that you call a Court. Somewhere I used to think was where you found JUSTICE! Boy, was I wrong.

What don’t you understand?  Is it any wonder I am NOW classed as ANGRY! Is it any wonder I want to join the myriads of angry dads’ groups?

There is nothing wrong with ANGER, ANGER gets you to your feet to fight an INJUSTICE. It is violence we abhor!

With almost a billion dollars allocated to domestic violence – and rightly so – $40 million to men and basically none allocated specifically to dads just doesn’t quite cut it! Now, I am not whinging. Domestic violence is a blight on our country, and it deserves the funding it gets. But so do men. It happens on both sides of the fence, believe me.

What don’t you understand? I guess you won’t, until you go through it. And with nearly half of marriages in this country ending in divorce, you may still. Then you will understand how quickly you will fall.

You will know what it feels like to lose your life partner, your kids, family members, friends, your home, your mind, your job, and any chance of getting back on your feet. All on the presumption of an unfounded allegation that you are innocent of.

I hope you don’t. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

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