Helping children learn from their choices.

When I first heard of STEP, I thought it was for step-families. And although I was divorced, I was not in a position to consider becoming a step-father to anyone else’s kid or inviting a woman to be a step-mother to my son.

But I soon discovered STEP stands for Systematic Training for Effective Parenting. Basically, it is a method to provide guidance and discipline to a child – and it works. It works for infants, and it works for teenagers. Hey, it worked for me – and my parents never heard of STEP – but they were big devotees of common sense.

Effective parenting revolves around the laws of logical and natural consequences.

Life Lessons

If a baby in a high chair knocks the spoon out of the hand that feeds him, it might be an accident; try again. But if the child continues to be disinterested in eating, simply put the lid back on the jar of baby food, and say, “I can see you’re not hungry right now. Maybe you’ll be hungry when it’s time for dinner.”

What parent hasn’t played the ‘pick-up game’? That’s when a toddler will drop a toy, and when his mom or dad picks it up and returns it to him, he will drop it again. If this is fun for the parent, great! But if the caregiver doesn’t care to play this game, they should stop picking it up!

If a little girl doesn’t want to put away her toys, explain that “I will put the toys in a bag and put the bag away for a day.” Logical consequences go a long way to encourage acceptable behaviour.

When I failed English in the 7^th grade, my parents made me use my own hard-earned money to pay for summer school. I learned more than English that year; I learned about natural consequences.

I wish I had discovered STEP when my child was younger.

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Image courtesy of Adobe.