By Dale with help from Lottie Lewis

Being a parent brings the biggest shifts in mood I’ve ever experienced. One minute, you’re struggling to get your little one to sleep, being screamed at and generally yearning for your old freedom. Literally eight minutes later, you’re sat on the sofa, welling up at videos of your baby.

Watching my partner evolve into a mother so naturally is one of the best things I’ve ever experienced. While parenting also seemed to come naturally to me, witnessing how my other half instantly embraced this new challenge with open arms is astonishing.

Watch out for ‘just wait until’ parents who, when things are going well for you, will say, “Just wait until (insert the difficult stage they went through)”. Countless times when we have mentioned that Luca is sleeping well we hear, “Oh just wait until the four-month regression,” or some other made-up-parenting-term that Luca seemed to bypass. If you took in this energy from every parent you met, you’d be a worrying mess.

The second hardest thing is probably how your relationship with your partner changes. Whilst the love and wonder between the four walls you call home will undoubtedly increase to levels you never knew possible, there will be days when you feel more like housemates rather than a couple. When the dishes in the sink are pouring over the edge and the thought of having to cook is too much. When you’re both extremely sleep deprived and struggling to think about anything else other than a quick nap.

I was told beforehand how new dads can often feel like a spare part those first few weeks. When the baby basically hangs off the teet for the few hours they are awake.

My best advice during this time is to accept that your role is to take care of your partner. Cook for her, give her any free time you can, let her sleep in, massage her. Do anything you can to make her life easier and she’ll be able to be an even better mum in return.

We’ve made no secret of the fact that Luca came (a few years) earlier than planned. When we found out, I pretty much cried for two weeks straight. I simply couldn’t imagine how I – someone who has probably spent a total of 12 minutes with under 5’s in the past 20 years – was going to be responsible for my own.

However, a dear friend told me then how he felt that this challenge could be exactly what I needed. Fast forward 15 months and I think he may have been right.

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Originally published at Bump & Baby Club.