Both times I have given birth so far, they have been induced by a stretch and sweep, as well as synthetic oxytocin (syntocinon) the first time, as I had pre-eclampsia (dangerously high blood pressure). The benefit was that I had some time to mentally and practically prepare for the births, and also that active labour was short (about 3-4 hours each time).

Still, life gets busy, and despite the instinct to nest and collect all necessities before birth, your due date can creep up on you before you know it. We had planned to get the capsule installed in the car before the first birth, but the due date was moved up a week because of my blood pressure.

Thankfully, the obstetrician did not pressure me to have the birth induced on the day it was first scheduled for, and I was able to wait a couple of days, during which we had time to do all the last-minute things that made me feel ready for this life-changing experience.

Vital Support

As my mother was far away in another country, I was blessed to be able to ask an experienced mother of five, my friend Genevieve, to be my second support person. When she heard that I had pre-eclampsia, she immediately showed up with a mountain of provisions to try to lower my blood pressure naturally (tuna, spinach, cranberry juice; Epsom salts for relaxing baths).

She was a calming presence in the birth suite, singing hymns, playing Gregorian chant recordings, praying and encouraging me through the contractions. The pre-birth classes from the hospital had taught us expectant mums to visualise soothing lavender fields, or that each contraction was an ocean wave bringing our baby closer to shore.

We had been advised to bring whatever would make us feel comfortable during the process, including favourite scents. I brought a small bottle of eucalyptus-scented Chinese medicinal oil, which my mother likes to sniff when she has a headache. The familiar smell made it seem like she was with me.

Unexpected Snags

The second time I gave birth, active labour began at 1 a.m., and we had to unceremoniously leave our toddler with his godparents. He was terribly upset, but they soothed him with videos of his father singing to him.

Unfortunately, our car battery died at the hospital, so after all the kerfuffle, my husband took 14 hours to get back to our son. Baby #1 was not amused, and refused to acknowledge me for the first 15 minutes when he came the following day to meet his sister. But he swiftly adjusted to the new addition, and I awoke to find his hand resting protectively on her head even in sleep.

Get Ready

I was miffed the second time I gave birth as I had forgotten to bring that comforting medicinal oil. Although your due date may seem ages away, it’s a good idea to prepare a hospital bag in advance, as pregnancy and birth are unpredictable. The last thing you want is to be scrambling for your birthing aids during an emergency.

Preparing during your second trimester might be ideal, as you tend to have more energy then. About a month prior to your due date, you can have the capsule installed in your car.

After all that preparation, make sure your husband actually brings the bag along to the birth. During our first birth, my husband left one bag of supplies in the car, thinking that he would be able to duck down later for it. We ended up using a newborn nappy and singlet from the hospital.

The second time, we forgot the newborn nappies too – fortunately, Genevieve had just been given one the night before!

If your husband is working and not able to quickly rush back to assist you when labour begins, ensure that you have other support people around who can spring to your side or who can care for your other children. Besides my children’s godparents, I had a retired couple from church ready to take my son if his godparents were at work.

Birth can be a scary process as you “lose control” of your body and have to surrender to its natural rhythm while accepting that complications may occur. But with the right supports in place, it can become a marvellous memory, marking the entrance of new life into this world.

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Image courtesy of Isaac Taylor.