Are you living in the now, or in the glory days of your memory? With life moving ever faster, the cost is high if we fail to keep up. This is a challenging podcast (#47 Real Talk for Real Men).

There was a time when you could build your life around a single career, even a single employer. Work hard and you had a job for life and a secure retirement.  Today, you are unlikely to have the same career your whole life, let alone the same employer. People are changing jobs every 4 years or so today — and very often not by choice.

What was once seemingly permanent is not permanent any more.

Do you have a sense of permanence about things that are really only temporary?

The question is, what is that view costing you?

You and I cannot afford to indulge that feeling of permanence in the temporary.

To find out what this is all about, and your pathway to shift to a mindset that handles change, listen to Real Talk 4 Real Men’s latest podcast, episode 47 here:

First question …

What’s the cost?

Yes, there is a cost.

We simply can’t afford to live in a fantasy world. We need to live in the real world.

We all know that the world is changing at an incredible pace — not just technology (I can vividly remember learning to program on my 1980’s Atari.  Today, this laptop I’m writing on has more computing power than the entire Apollo space program.)

Your community you live in is changing.

The culture is changing.

Morality and values are changing.

You are changing too.

The cost is that we are not adequately prepared for whatever is coming next.

Stop deluding yourself that somehow you have arrived at some permanent place.

Your home is not permanent, your car is not permanent, your friends are not permanent, your career, your good health and physical strength… are not permanent.

You set yourself up for a difficult season of life if you believe these things to be permanent, and then wake up one day to find they are gone.

So what should we do?

1. Live in the reality of where you are and who you are.

In short, don’t live in a fantasy world.

For example, Guy used to be at the top of tree in his industry trading energy futures.  For a while, his firm was one of the best-performing commodity funds in South-East Asia.  There was a sense that the trading firm would grow and be more and more successful and that he would have a long distinguished career in commodities investment.

That’s long since over now.  It wasn’t permanent. Guy can’t continue to live as if he was still there.

2. Aim to be prepared for change.

Have an objective of building a skill-set that prepares us for the transient nature of life.

What should that skill-set look like?  Well, it needs to include:

  • Opening your eyes. Don’t be deluded into living in a fantasy world. Willful ignorance of some monster growing in your life (as you ignore it), will eventually result in that monster attacking you when it is strong, and you are ill-prepared to stand against it.
  • Character. We need to have the character to be able to respond in a healthy and constructive way through transience.  The good news is that tackling uncertainty builds character.
  • Communication skills. When you can communicate intelligently, you become useful to yourself and to others. It opens doors and makes you far more useful.
  • Managing your own affairs.  Financially, organisationally, even emotionally.  Be responsible for your own affairs and learn how to manage them well.
  • Develop transferable skills. Develop skills that survive change. Skills like leadership, creativity and problem-solving.

What’s in it for me?

In terms of why should you bother, what’s in it for you?  There should be a few obvious reasons that jump out at you from the above list, but it is worth highlighting two:

First, we get to harvest and enjoy this life more fully, rather than live in a sad, regretful place in the past or in some unrealised future.  Embrace your life — warts and all — and make the most of what you have.

Secondly, we will see new opportunities that we can grow into, that are fulfilling to you and a benefit to others.

So reflect on this point.

Things are not set in concrete in the world you live,
so get ready to be able to manage change in your life.
~ Guy Mullon

Listen to the podcast here:

You can stream it above, but we recommend subscribing and using one of the following services to listen.  Please subscribe using iTunesGoogle PlayAndroid or PodBean (download the Podbean app on Google Play or iTunes).

Want Some Help?

If you are facing a major life transition, or looking to plan one (such as a career change), they are not easy to navigate.

You will sail through it much better with some help.

Did you know that life transition coaching is a thing? (using the language of my millennial young adults).  If you would like to find out about how a personal professional life coach can help you navigate through life’s changes, you can grab a complimentary ‘virtual coffee’ with coach Guy.

Read more about coaching here.

For more discussion on changing times, check out Having a Go.

If the loss of something that seemed permanent has left you with a sense of trauma, you might benefit from this post: Responding Well to Trauma.


Originally published at Real Men 24/7.
Photo by Fabiano Rodrigues from Pexels.

About the Author: Guy Mullon and Chris Field

Chris Field and Guy Mullon team up as the podcast bros to bring you Real Talk 4 Real Men. It is a show where they tackle the real issues faced by men in today's world. With guests or just with the two of them, you will always be guaranteed to get challenged and encouraged and to get it real across the life topics of business, family, faith and a man's own well-being. You can find Chris' blog here and find his YouTube channel here.

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