Without spending intentional, quality time with each other, we quickly get out of sync. When we do, our patience wears thin, our tones get harsh, and bickering over small things increases. The speed at which disconnect can occur always shocks me. 

No one likes being in an argument. Arguments stir up intense emotions and can leave us feeling misunderstood and wounded. Yet, not all arguments are equal. Arguments mean different things in different circumstances. An argument is defined as a work of persuasion. We use arguments to convince others of our point of view. Well-thought arguments are crucial to social discourse and an important tool in workplace decision-making. When we make a ...

Like a Marine, a dad is the first vanguard in their child’s life. Dads are a child’s first superhero. This is why the world needs men who refuse — come hell or high water —  to go out on the devil’s terms. Put simply, the world needs resilient dads. Dads who bounce back from life’s roundhouse kicks, saying with the best of them: “Semper Fi.” Fathers who choose to remain always ...

A number of years ago, I spent five round-the-world trips on a lawyer to represent my case to be a present dad in my children’s growing up. I could sensibly calculate that separation would force the divvying up of my children’s time between parents, but I was determined to protect as much of it as I could, because I believe my children and I need time to maintain our strong, wholehearted ...

What makes for an epic marriage? A marriage that faces and transcends challenges and obstacles, that has an interior resilience and grace that comes from the God who is always ready to encourage us. We recently attended two weddings of close family friends. This time, a different part of the ceremony really stood out for us. It was the preamble the celebrant said immediately before the couple exchanged vows. N and ...

Let’s face it – marriage is a tough gig these days. With divorce rates higher than we’d like, too many families are being torn apart by marriage breakdown. What can couples do to immunise their marriages against this tragedy? Marital resilience starts with a well-grounded understanding of what marriage is and what it isn’t. A lot of couples get themselves into trouble because they expect marriage, that is their spouse, to ...

Helicopter parents are well-meaning parents who hover over their kids. If something happens, heaven forbid, such as falling over, fighting over a toy, or getting a bad grade, helicopter parents swoop in and do everything they can to make things better. Sometimes being a helicopter parent is a good thing — in crowds, near water, or anywhere that physical danger exists. Stunted Growth But helicopter parenting when it’s playtime, sports time, ...

Want to know the easiest way to give your kids a confidence boost? It’s the most sure-fire simple way to increase your child’s positivity and resilience. Here it is… Enjoy them. Spend time with them. Let go of your agenda and be with them and listen to them. That’s it. Presence Taking the time to savour the moments we have with them — to really enjoy our kids — is something ...

Board games are boring. Yes, it’s not the greatest way to start off an article selling the importance of tabletop games hammered out between dads, mums, and their kids. Like it or leave it — win, or lose — I have no real love for the genre. The very last thing as a dad I’ve wanted to do, is play Monopoly, spin the wheel in Game of Life, or face the ...

Counsellors and educators often talk about the importance of fun in a marriage. For those of us raising families, couple fun is one of the first casualties in the busy family schedule. Enter the Couple Project! –  a great way to put fun back on the agenda with these multiple benefits: Time together. This is so important, many marriage counsellors will demand their ‘recovering’ couples prioritise time together, up to 15 ...

Have you heard of snowplough or lawnmower parents? They’re the ones who push all the obstacles out of the way of their children. Isn’t that a good thing? We don’t want our children to endure unnecessary hardship. We want the best for our kids — and we want to help them get it. Building Resilience I once heard a radio guest describe how organic vegetables are more nutrient-dense than commercially grown ...

Adventure is essential for developing maturity and independence through firsthand experiences. When undertaken as a family, adventure forms lasting marvellous memories and excellent life skills. Some time ago, I rang a friend who was going around Australia on a 41/2-month adventure with his family. They were just about to cross the Nullarbor Plain, which contains the longest straight stretch (146.6 km) of road in the world. This section of road is ...

Some of the most fascinating research being done right now to help kids be positive and resilient deals with the idea of strengths. Do you know what your children’s strengths are? Can you name them? Take a minute and think about that. Do you ever talk with your children about their strengths? Children who know their strengths and use them regularly are more resilient, less likely to experience depression or anxiety, ...

Homeschooled children can enjoy a more holistic, grounded and in-depth education than their peers in school. Here are several factors behind their lifelong success. Look across a spectrum of homeschooling success stories, and you’ll come across the words freedom and flexibility. Homeschooled children tend to be more successful in life because home education is elastic. This scholastic elasticity makes homeschooling a parental powerhouse packed with potential. In practice, homeschool curricula and ...

We’ve been hearing from many of our SmartLoving leaders around the world looking for help in supporting couples under stress. There’s certainly a lot of stress going around with pandemic-induced changes and uncertainty. It got us reflecting on marital resilience — the ability of a relationship to endure and persevere through difficulties. There is quite a bit of information on personal resilience, and it’s a buzzword in education these days, but ...

While homeschooling, a timetable is necessary, but so is the ability to pivot and make space for unexpected events. A balance of routine and flexibility will create a healthy learning environment. Make this an axiom: routine is life, yet without flexibility, a routine life is dull. Without elasticity, routine devolves into a rigid, joyless obsession over ledger ticks and timestamps. Flexibility saves routine from its inevitable dreary end. In the context ...

Married life, like your career, take effort and investment. For resilience in your marital relationship, don’t expect your spouse to fulfil your every want; instead, learn to love them and grow with them through the ups and downs of life. A healthy and realistic perspective is the basis for a solid marriage. Let’s face it — marriage can be a tough gig these days. Living in a culture that almost expects ...

Parenthood is the art of making yourself obsolete. It involves ensuring as far as possible that your child has the self-discipline and character to make it through the ups and downs of life, far into the future. They learn from us the tools necessary for resilience and success. Every year, there are four questions all mums, dads, uncles, aunts, guardians or grandparents involved in child-rearing should try to ask themselves: Am ...

There are moments when one can feel totally overwhelmed by the stresses of parenting, but take a deep breath — these moments pass. When I feel overwhelmed by my family and life in general, I like to watch a movie that reminds me I much prefer my crazy than someone else’s. I love watching Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good Very Bad Day. I even like watching Cheaper by the ...

When you are faced with the failure of much of what you believed about life and yourself, where do you turn? Can you reset your life? How do you begin? What do you do when the way you were committed to living has not worked out, and you come to a point of realising it never will? When your life has suddenly changed — perhaps a midlife crisis, career change, health ...