On Tuesday 19 November 2019, we celebrate International Men’s Day. Many people don’t even know that such a day exists. Some years ago, Punch Columnist Richard Fleming wrote an article to celebrate International Women’s Day titled, “Why there is no International Men’s Day”. The opening sentence gives us the foundation for his thesis. “With today being International Women’s Day, there will be millions of men around the world thinking, “This is ...

It is always a great thing when respected leaders take a stand for the male of the species, especially for our young boys. Sadly, the vendetta against men and boys seems to be gathering momentum. ‘Toxic masculinity’ seems to be the buzzword of the moment. In 2000, Christina Hoff Sommers published The War Against Boys: How Misguided Feminism Is Harming Our Young Men. In the book, Sommers challenged what she called ...

On Father’s Day Sunday 1 September 2002, we launched the very first Dads4Kids weekly newsletter for men. Sign Up Here. We have not missed a Sunday since. It is up to eight hundred and ninety-nine issues later, and no, I am not counting. Let me share the reflection from the very first newsletter. I believe the greatest thing a father can do for his children is to love his wife. Love ...

Some time ago, my friend Steve Blizard sent me a really good article by Bob Hostetler about the Four Phases of Parenthood. Bob writes the following: It came as a shock. In the course of telling a story to my friend Jon, I mentioned that I had gone into my son’s room to wake him up. Jon interrupted me. “How old is Aaron?” We both knew very well how old he ...

The single hardest thing for any Dad is trying to get the balance right between love and discipline for his children. I often use the expression ‘grace and truth’. Grace is really another name for love. The challenge becomes more difficult the more children you have, and I think especially the more boys you have. Boys seem to find your limit and then take you past it. Boys, for wont of ...

My wife got me a book for Father’s Day called “Dear Dad”. It is a collection of letters to fathers, edited by Samuel Johnson OAM. The description on the back cover says, “A heartfelt, honest and very human book of letters that will make you smile and make you cry. It is the perfect gift for the Dad in your life. A reminder to say how you feel before it’s too ...

Happy Father’s Day. I hope and pray you have a good one. Recently I received a call at the Dads4Kids office. It was most unusual. Junior Stowers was his name, and he was was calling from inside a detention centre. Having performed concerts in 20 gaols across Australia (where nobody has a mobile phone), this really did my head in. However, I found that Immigration Detention Centres have a different set ...

As Father’s Day is just around the corner, we are excited to be releasing our ‘Your Child Needs You’ Dads4Kids TV and Community Service Announcements. Already Channel 7 nationally has said yes, as well as community channels, Imparja, and Australian Christian Channel. We expect that all the commercial regional stations will play it, and are hoping that Channel 9 will say yes, as it has done before. Unfortunately, Metro 10 is ...

There is a lot of talk these days about creating safe spaces. Mostly for minority groups who feel victimised. A lot of this discussion is dribble, but at times there is a case for such a cause. Some minority groups do need a place where they can feel safe and be able to express their emotions and feelings, and be affirmed in the process. Interestingly the largest minority group currently on ...

Fathers and mothers each bring different qualities to parenting. Fathers can’t mother, and mothers can’t father. That is why both parents are so important to a healthy upbringing. Being a parent is all about working towards redundancy. In other words, there will come a time when your children will be able to stand on their own two feet. Eagles do it with their chicks that don’t want to leave the nest. ...

Albert Einstein said, “Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.” Einstein acknowledged his failures as a husband and as a father in moments of candour in his private letters. To his credit, this is more than most men will admit to. Thoreau was right to say, “most men lead lives of quiet desperation”. I ...

Last night I came home from a busy day at the office. I walked into the kitchen where my son and daughter-in-law were cooking dinner. I instinctively reached out my hands behind both their backs and rubbed their backs as if to congratulate them for the beautiful dinner we were about to eat. My son did not comment, but my daughter-in-law said, “Do it again! Your friendly back rub made me ...

There is a saying that ‘a good father gets down to his children’s level’. This really came to light recently at my son’s 35th birthday dinner. Even though it was a birthday party for an adult, it was one of the most child-friendly parties I have ever been to. The table was only 400mm high, in a traditional Thai, sit-on-the-floor-and-eat style. In other words, the table’s height suited young children, especially ...

Some time ago, I wrote an article called “Ten Reasons for Eating Together” for the Dads4Kids weekly newsletter to inspire fathers and encourage families. The week after the story went out to 5,000 fathers, I spoke to my wife about the newsletter. I said, “You know, a lot of men are going to start eating more with their families after last week’s newsletter — 10 Reasons for Eating Together, but not ...

‘Fathers Who Dare Win’ is a confronting but captivating title for a great book on how to be a great dad. Ian Grant, the author, was for many years New Zealand’s number one parenting coach. Ian and his wife founded the Parenting Place in 1993. That organisation is now the largest positive parenting charity in New Zealand. The following extract from Fathers Who Dare Win which is about becoming a hero ...

I remember when my teenage sons first played Korn’s music for me. I found it really disturbing. It just wasn’t my kind of music. I had grown up playing blues, rock and reggae on my guitar. I found the music very dark. The discordant riffs were off-putting as were Jonathan Davis growling, sometimes screaming, lyrics. The New York Times said in 1996 that the band was “mad at everyone including themselves”. ...

Only a few days ago, I got a call from the eldest daughter of a dear friend telling me that her Dad had passed way from a heart attack. Ian was at his work, and without any apparent warning, he collapsed and died. He was comparatively young and in good health. After the phone call, I was in a state of shock. We didn’t see each other a lot but we ...

Richard Branson said, “If happiness is the goal – and it should be, then adventures should be top priority.” It is the priority of adventure that makes being out in the bush with a bunch of dads and their kids really exhilarating. Wollondilly River Station, the place for our annual Dads4kids Bush Camp, is set in a deep valley not too far from the famous Wombeyan Caves in the Southern Highlands ...

Counting Crows had a hit in 2002 with Joni Mitchell’s famous song Big Yellow Taxi. Good songs never get old. The line that stands out in the song for me is “all and all it seems to go, but you don’t know what you got till it’s gone”. Such was the case of a good friend of mine, Mick Robbins. We had only met a half a dozen times, but he ...

Eric Clapton sang, “If I could change the world.” Many men dream about changing the world, but very few actually attempt it. Some succeed in bringing change, but is that change healthy, or does it create more problems than it solves? As a student radical, growing up in the late sixties, I believed it was possible to change the world. Of course, when you are young, and want to change the world, ...