Ironically, my marriage ended as it should have begun. After lodging divorce papers the other day, I ambled out of the court offices into Salamanca Place. I deliberately slowed my pace to the steady step of a bridal march in order to soak in the soft morning sun. The sun’s glow wrapped an embrace of blanketing cheer that warmed my sombre mood. Fifteen years earlier, wedding day rain was a disappointing ...

My two earthly angels are spirited souls. Some of their spirit erupts spontaneously from joy spilling out of a moment where our awesome is in sync. This afternoon was a classic. Now, I appreciate that at 2:59 pm my daughters’ energy levels are spent. Their reserve tank is down to fumes. Yet, the 3:00 pm end-of-school alarm triggers some primal force, and the tapped-out slump converts swiftly to a frenzied push ...

I send out a warm Mother’s Day wish for my mum to be blessed with genuine pride in having raised three awesome men. I admire the example of care she set in her nursing work, especially with the elderly. I saw Mum argue the case for patients to be treated with the utmost dignity and respect when the frailty of the aged patients prevented them from advocating for themselves. I hold ...

Once upon a not-so-long-ago-time, I wasn’t a single dad. I was just a dad. Well, not “just”. For a just-starting-out dad, I had set some parenting goals. I quite deliberately set out to be anything but “just a dad.” I had a profound sense of parenting purpose. I was pounding with pride at the prospect of crafting a wonderful little person and was underway with nurturing and nursing my – our ...

A few years back I let go of a muffled swear word after pacing mile after frustrating mile of city blocks with my daughters looking for smart black flats that bucked the trend of imitation tramp. Ever alert to any parental blemish that might be used as evidence against me, my eldest caught my cussing which was supposed to be contained in my head. My potty-mouth shoe-shopping incident has become a ...

Bill runs his own business devoted to strengthening the relationship between children and parents. He artfully taps into the desire children and parents have for wholehearted connectedness. Bill simply prompts parents to maintain time and space in the relationship schedule for it to thrive. Bill shares with his parent and child audience various conversation starters to help them to sharpen up their skills to have the hearty conversations that make for ...

I am amused by the serious instruction of friends, “Do what you love and what feels right for you.” Their career counselling advice amuses me because they haven’t regarded that what I love and what feels right can sometimes yell wildly at each other in conflict. In the red corner, What-I-Love argues that there are Tassie mountain summits that I am yet to tread. In the blue corner, What-Feels-Right makes the ...

This year I am grateful that the Easter Bunny won’t be stopping by. The shambolic mess that the break‑and‑enter bunny left last year has left me thankful for a reprieve. There are many things that I celebrate at Easter… family traditions, the ceremony and stories of Easter accounts and the extra holiday time that I am able to share with my beautiful earthly angels. I definitely do not celebrate the intrusion ...

I am Joy. I am the happy-go-lucky character that sets out to stir my children into happiness when Sadness mopes forlornly into their day. I parent to have my daughters be afflicted with my happy contagion. That was before the Joy character of the Inside Out movie set me to believing that it is okay for Joy and Sadness to sit comfortably together. Joy – the movie character – had her ...

Sometimes on the other side of a wonderful parenting weekend, there is a sense that single parenting is a clock-on-clock-off thing. A full parenting weekend involves the tumble and fun and out of sorts and homework and silliness and around-the-house helping out. Then, it goes quiet when I mentally punch off my dad timecard after wrapping up the school drop-off, knowing that the mum shift starts that afternoon. And, while I ...

Sometimes my weekends are a maddening tussle to make the one-after-the-other events that seem to start flooding our Friday and spill into our Saturday and Sunday. Sport, birthday parties, youth group, housework, homework, school socials all back up, one against the other, to make our dad and daughters time fairly frenetic. Leading into my last weekend with Miss 7 and Miss 12, I knew that my Friday to Monday was going ...

“Inaugurated in 1957, the Australian Father of the Year has been awarded annually to high-profile, famous fathers, from prime ministers and politicians to sportsmen, business leaders, entertainers and musicians acknowledging the support, guidance and love they show to Australian children.” So says Wikipedia. I am not famous or high-profile. The smear-the-opponent style of politics means that I will never go there, and my dad jokes hardly rate as entertainment. A long ...

A few weeks ago, on an impulse and wanting to share a snapshot of my post-separation status, I wrote a part-whimsical, part-serious piece about the worst parts of being a single dad. By implication, if some parts are worst, then there must be some best bits, says my cerebral dialogue. Voice Number One says the best bit is simply being a dad. Voice Number One ignores the “single” tag and just ...

I separated from my ex-wife a few years ago. I think that it was five years ago. It could have been six. On reflection, the first six months seemed like six years. During the frenzied rush of committing to a rental and buying a car and purchasing beds for my daughters, plenty of well-meaning people offered the saying that “things will get better… they always do!” Yes, things do get better, ...

Toileting is pitiful in a onesie! And so, they are not the usual garb of this practical single dad, but for a social experiment that I crafted to play out. I cannot conceive that a bedtime costume as impractical as a onesie would ever be engineered for anything more than a practical joke. I imagine the pyjama design team in the boardroom some Friday (after a way-too-long lunch) being more than ...

Visiting the dentist has all the appeal of cleaning my daughters’ long, clagged hair out of the shower drain. I visit annually because it is the right thing to do. Each visit follows a predictable pattern. I arrive early at the clinic. I eagerly anticipate being able to read a National Geographic (I have allergies to sitting still doing nothing and like learning things) and ultimately am disappointed by the tattered ...

School holidays shared with my daughters ought to be a fun time. I have a notion that the week-long blocks of time I share with my daughters during school holidays should be blissful. Yet, day three into the week with my daughters, and I was terrified as my racing-harness chair tipped back enough for my stomach to spill into my mouth. I sensed my centre of gravity was about to topple ...

Dad’s log. Day 3 of our 8-day expedition of exploration… my crew of two settled excitedly into their temporary resort environment. Their sense of holiday time gives them cause to make the argument that five serves of vegetable and two of fruit does not apply. “But, Daa-aad… it’s holidays… we ought to be having fun!” is their reasoned argument against not tending to the standard chores. Somehow the crew have morphed ...

Taylor is the popular girl at my daughters’ all-girl school. All schools have popular kids. This popular girl holds some sort of easy charm, often leaving some girls pining for that social standing. Normally I wouldn’t be too fussed about the popular girl; however, I believe that Taylor is stepping onto my parenting turf. And, when it comes to the well-being of my children, I am fiercely territorial. I try to ...

I hold a lofty ideal for my daughters. Lofty and simple. I want them to be sure in believing that they are wholesome people of value, who can tend generously to others and themselves. If I am doing well as a mindful dad, then I am setting my daughters up to be caring companions to friend, family and foreigner. As they develop the skills to rely less on me and fend ...