I have always felt that our society is at a tipping point when it comes to the restoration of fatherhood in our society. Part of that is my innate tendency to optimism. For me the glass is always half full. I can remember sharing as the conference organiser in the Main Committee Room of Parliament House at the very first National Strategic Conference on Fatherhood in 2003, saying very much in ...

I am fascinated by what people say and think before they leave the planet. Wisdom is sometimes very costly and as you consider the past, you can understand the future better. Dr Bruce Robinson, probably Australia’s bestselling fatherhood author, wrote his book, Fathering from the Fast Lane, because of the words that men told him on their deathbeds. Bruce is a doctor who treats those who have lung and respiratory illnesses. ...

On Father’s Day Sunday 1 September 2002, we launched the very first Dads4Kids weekly newsletter for men. Sign Up Here. We have not missed a Sunday since. It is up to eight hundred and ninety-nine issues later, and no, I am not counting. Let me share the reflection from the very first newsletter. I believe the greatest thing a father can do for his children is to love his wife. Love ...

Some time ago, my friend Steve Blizard sent me a really good article by Bob Hostetler about the Four Phases of Parenthood. Bob writes the following: It came as a shock. In the course of telling a story to my friend Jon, I mentioned that I had gone into my son’s room to wake him up. Jon interrupted me. “How old is Aaron?” We both knew very well how old he ...

The single hardest thing for any Dad is trying to get the balance right between love and discipline for his children. I often use the expression ‘grace and truth’. Grace is really another name for love. The challenge becomes more difficult the more children you have, and I think especially the more boys you have. Boys seem to find your limit and then take you past it. Boys, for wont of ...

My wife got me a book for Father’s Day called “Dear Dad”. It is a collection of letters to fathers, edited by Samuel Johnson OAM. The description on the back cover says, “A heartfelt, honest and very human book of letters that will make you smile and make you cry. It is the perfect gift for the Dad in your life. A reminder to say how you feel before it’s too ...

Happy Father’s Day. I hope and pray you have a good one. Recently I received a call at the Dads4Kids office. It was most unusual. Junior Stowers was his name, and he was was calling from inside a detention centre. Having performed concerts in 20 gaols across Australia (where nobody has a mobile phone), this really did my head in. However, I found that Immigration Detention Centres have a different set ...

There is a lot of talk these days about creating safe spaces. Mostly for minority groups who feel victimised. A lot of this discussion is dribble, but at times there is a case for such a cause. Some minority groups do need a place where they can feel safe and be able to express their emotions and feelings, and be affirmed in the process. Interestingly the largest minority group currently on ...

Last night I came home from a busy day at the office. I walked into the kitchen where my son and daughter-in-law were cooking dinner. I instinctively reached out my hands behind both their backs and rubbed their backs as if to congratulate them for the beautiful dinner we were about to eat. My son did not comment, but my daughter-in-law said, “Do it again! Your friendly back rub made me ...

There is a saying that ‘a good father gets down to his children’s level’. This really came to light recently at my son’s 35th birthday dinner. Even though it was a birthday party for an adult, it was one of the most child-friendly parties I have ever been to. The table was only 400mm high, in a traditional Thai, sit-on-the-floor-and-eat style. In other words, the table’s height suited young children, especially ...

Some time ago, I wrote an article called “Ten Reasons for Eating Together” for the Dads4Kids weekly newsletter to inspire fathers and encourage families. The week after the story went out to 5,000 fathers, I spoke to my wife about the newsletter. I said, “You know, a lot of men are going to start eating more with their families after last week’s newsletter — 10 Reasons for Eating Together, but not ...

‘Fathers Who Dare Win’ is a confronting but captivating title for a great book on how to be a great dad. Ian Grant, the author, was for many years New Zealand’s number one parenting coach. Ian and his wife founded the Parenting Place in 1993. That organisation is now the largest positive parenting charity in New Zealand. The following extract from Fathers Who Dare Win which is about becoming a hero ...

There is a saying, “without a vision, people perish”. In my experience, this is true. Many times, people don’t perish on the outside, but they do perish on the inside. It was Thoreau who said, “Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them”! We all need to have a vision to avoid perishing in some way or other. We all need ...

I remember when my teenage sons first played Korn’s music for me. I found it really disturbing. It just wasn’t my kind of music. I had grown up playing blues, rock and reggae on my guitar. I found the music very dark. The discordant riffs were off-putting as were Jonathan Davis growling, sometimes screaming, lyrics. The New York Times said in 1996 that the band was “mad at everyone including themselves”. ...

Mother’s Day will be celebrated on Sunday 12 May and we encourage you to make it a big celebration. Motherhood and mothers need to be valued and appreciated a lot more than they do. You know the line by now, “The greatest thing a father can do for his children is to love his children’s mother.” Why is it that so many men just don’t get that? A key part of ...

Many years ago, I went to the largest single day men’s conference in Australia, the Hillsong Men’s Conference.    One of the speakers, Dr A.R. Bernard, shared the title of his message, “What do Women Want“. A holy hush descend on the 5,000 men gathered in the auditorium as they all thought “Wow! I am going to find out today the question that many of my forbears desperately wanted to know but ...

Henry Youngman, a comedian who was known as ‘King of the One Liners’ once said, “I was an atheist for a while, but I gave it up, no holy-days.” Such a one liner about holy-days sums up the subject of this week’s newsletter – Easter Family Holidays. Most of us celebrate Easter holidays but where did they come from and why do we celebrate them? Most countries in the world celebrate ...

Counting Crows had a hit in 2002 with Joni Mitchell’s famous song Big Yellow Taxi. Good songs never get old. The line that stands out in the song for me is “all and all it seems to go, but you don’t know what you got till it’s gone”. Such was the case of a good friend of mine, Mick Robbins. We had only met a half a dozen times, but he ...

Eric Clapton sang, “If I could change the world.” Many men dream about changing the world, but very few actually attempt it. Some succeed in bringing change, but is that change healthy, or does it create more problems than it solves? As a student radical, growing up in the late sixties, I believed it was possible to change the world. Of course, when you are young, and want to change the world, ...

The phrase ‘I am Spartacus!’ was taken from the 1960 film Spartacus by Stanley Kubrick. Historically, Spartacus was a slave who trained as a gladiator under oppressive Roman rule, and who led a slave rebellion in 73 BC. He amassed a large army of fellow slaves and led his men to defeat the Roman legion on several occasions. Eventually, the Roman Senate sent Marcus Crassus to put down this rebellion with ...