When it comes to marriage, relationships and arguments, there are a lot of myths out there. Here are five of the most common. Myth 1: Good Couples Don’t Argue The presence or absence of arguments is not a good indicator of the health of a marriage. Some couples who don’t argue are living detached, parallel lives. They’ve essentially checked out of the marriage and have given up caring. These couples are ...
We recently enjoyed a week in New Zealand – about five days with some of our children and then two blessed days on our own. It was like a tonic for our soul and our marriage. Long walks with relaxed afternoons soaking up beautiful vistas and abundant wildlife. One such cheeky local was a Fantail – a small native bird that sashayed its tail and flitted about our feet. This friendly avian accompanied ...
On Friday afternoon, we went on a bushwalk with Byron’s work colleagues. Although we were with other people, we so enjoyed the time together. Walking is remarkably therapeutic for us… perhaps it’s the natural environment, or maybe it’s simply the absence of the constant phone, email and text distraction. Whatever it is, is not the point. It just feels strangely normal and earthy. Like we are stepping for a few hours ...
Yesterday we celebrated our daughter’s wedding to a wonderful man and family. Our daughter Kiara looked absolutely radiant with an interior joy; her now-husband Doug, was magnificent -- strong, steady and adoring. Their evident love for each other lit up the church and the celebration that followed. As parents of the bride, we were afforded the opportunity to address the guests, and we thought we’d share some of our thoughts with ...
Anything worth having is never free. As Francine and I raced around on a typical Saturday afternoon, we found ourselves at the local shopping village together. Never one to waste the opportunity to gain a ‘good husband’ brownie point, I declared we should have a ‘coffee date’. Naturally, Francine obliged -- she practically never says no to a ‘date’, no matter how pathetic. (Have I ever mentioned my “do you want ...
The most powerful influence on a couple is their family of origin. Good or bad, our experiences in our childhood prepared us for marriage. The young couple sitting opposite us had been married only a few years. They were experiencing some health challenges, but this is not what brought them to us; they were locked in a perpetual low-grade argument that never seemed to end. They were so ‘wired’, almost every ...
In a recent discussion at a youth conference, it was put to us by some of the participants that premarital sex was acceptable as long as it was a ‘committed’ relationship. Casual sex was seen to be inappropriate and perhaps dangerous, but if the couple were in a committed dating situation, then sex was okay. It sounds very reasonable and moderate, even mature; there is a certain sense of respect for ...
“A lot of men feel pressured by Valentine’s Day. They don’t like being expected to do something romantic for their wife or girlfriend on an arbitrary date on the calendar. They flinch when their mate drops hints in early February about what flowers or candy she prefers.” These are the words of Professor William Doherty, one of the world's most recognised academic authorities on marriage and family. He was one of ...
A Pew study released mid-January suggests a majority of mums and dads in the United States are prioritising money over marriage. 90% of those quizzed about ‘aspirations’ for their children ‘prioritized financial independence and career satisfaction’ as numero uno. Material Success The Research Centre’s findings claimed that for a majority of parents, ‘it’s extremely or very important their children be financially independent when they are adults.’ Almost as ‘equally important’ for ...
What Are the Signs and What Do They Mean? In today’s dating scene, there is a great deal of confusion about commitment and what it means. Scott Stanley*, one of the foremost thinkers on commitment, suggests that the old ‘commitment phobia’ explanation doesn’t fully explain the dilemma in which dating couples find themselves. One reason for this is the confusion between ‘public displays of affection’ and ‘public displays of commitment’. We’re ...
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