“Forgive them, for they know not what they do” (Lk 23:24). These words of Jesus as he was being crucified were meant not just for his executioners, but for all of us. His love transcends all our limitations and failures and calls us into life. We all have someone to forgive; someone who has disappointed, betrayed, abandoned or hurt us in some way. For those of us who are married, it’s ...

Too many New Year resolutions falter because they fail to address what really needs changing: the internal disposition that compels us into unwanted habits. A few years ago, we received a letter from an irate reader. We were tempted to point out his clear misinterpretation that led him to conclude almost the direct opposite of our intent. But we recognised in his words the wounded heart of a person imprisoned by ...

I have a confession to make. I’m a ‘marriage junkie’. Before I go any further let me warn you: this is a blast from the past in more ways than one. You see, I have written about this before, and I wish I could say I am getting better, but it is not the case. So why am I a marriage junkie and what exactly is a “Marriage Junkie?” Maybe it’s ...

This Father’s Day, may fathers everywhere receive a big bundle of love from their children. May healing and reconciliation take place where required, and may fathers step up to their calling as loving dads and role models for their offspring. The team at Dads4Kids wishes all Dads, all over Australia, a happy Father’s Day. It is always a busy time for us with the release of our new Father’s Day TV ...

Have you ever experienced the situation when someone has apologised but, while the words were said it lacked something, making it difficult for you to accept it? Sadly, most of us are not as good at apologising as we need to be. We think that it’s obvious, should just be instinctual, or that our love should somehow make it magically work. Well, it isn’t obvious, and it is not instinctual. We ...

We’ve been hearing from many of our SmartLoving leaders around the world looking for help in supporting couples under stress. There’s certainly a lot of stress going around with pandemic-induced changes and uncertainty. It got us reflecting on marital resilience — the ability of a relationship to endure and persevere through difficulties. There is quite a bit of information on personal resilience, and it’s a buzzword in education these days, but ...

Marriage is the coming together of two individuals, with natural differences. Loving honesty in communication helps us to grow together as one. What seems hard in marriage is often doing us good. A few weeks ago, we were invited to attend an event featuring Jordan Peterson. Curious to see this Canadian psychologist and academic, who was touring Australia with sell-out audiences, we took up the offer. One of the questions put ...

Fatherless father-of-two Rob Kenney has earned the “internet dad” title after millions tuned into a dad-help YouTube channel he created in April 2020. Kenney’s simple “Dad, How Do I?” vlog now has 3.83 million subscribers with over 18.4 million views. The 58-year-old social media “influencer’s” 30-year-old daughter Kristine Ponten attributes his popularity to COVID-19 lockdowns, stating,  “I don’t think it would’ve gone viral in another circumstance. It is definitely pandemic-specific regarding ...

Even if your marriage is going through difficulties, taking these small steps can work wonders in reigniting your love and smoothing out communication. A lot of people feel trapped in a dissatisfying or troubled marriage. They feel powerless to ‘fix’ it because their spouse refuses to join them in counselling or a marriage enrichment course. Yet in truth, there are lots of things a husband or wife can do on their ...

I am thankful for my “deadbeat” dad and encouraged by his example. Why? Because his mistakes have taught me what not to do as a father! Among the most inspirational figures in my life – who encourages my parenting style and has a significant impact on me – is my “deadbeat” dad. He wasn’t a successful father, but his failures have helped me try and avoid failures of my own. I ...

There are always ample opportunities to forgive others, especially in a marriage. But sometimes we don’t know how. Consider three tips to help you forgive more easily in the context of a covenant relationship. We remember those long nights in the first year of our marriage. In the infancy of his career, Byron was often late home from work as he juggled the demands on his time. Initially, Francine was so grateful when ...

I could have titled this article The amazing things that happen when a father says “sorry”, but having the courage to say sorry and exercise forgiveness will work for anyone: dad, mum, male or female. Some years ago, at my daughter’s engagement party, I had the honour of giving a short speech. Recently I wrote about the fact that “in families, change is the only constant”. What I didn’t tell you ...

Our children need to know how fortunate they are to live in Australia. As an adult, I have visited 22 countries, mostly in mission/aid capacities and mostly with our musical family. In most cases we were working with the poor. Not the rich. To put it bluntly, we got to know what was happening and wasn’t happening in each nation. It is possible to visit a nation as a tourist and ...

Eric Clapton sang, “If I could change the world.” Many men dream about changing the world, but very few actually attempt it. Some succeed in bringing change, but is that change healthy, or does it create more problems than it solves? As a student radical, growing up in the late sixties, I believed it was possible to change the world. Of course, when you are young, and want to change the world, ...

The first words the caller said after I picked up the phone were, “I wanted to kill him!” “Kill who?” I stammered. “Kill my father,” he said emphatically. Before I tell you what happened next, let me tell you his answer when I asked the question as to why he felt like killing his father. Andrew (not his real name) was the son of a travelling showman. ‘Showies’ travel around the ...

I was driving down the highway to work the other day, after just having a week’s holiday with my kids. I was grateful, especially when I hear from so many who don’t have the opportunity of being with their children. I knew the workload would be enormous. I mean a week away from the computer alone means at least 400-500 emails will need to be answered — that’s after I’ve sifted ...

A few years ago I was a happily married man — a beautiful wife, three sons, a home  that  was well on the way to being paid off, a job, and settled in the community.  We had just had our 10-year anniversary — a night on the town for the family.  A few bumps along the way, including some really tough surprises with our sons’ births, but everything was fine — ...