Related Articles from the News
Are We Outliving Marriage?
We’ve heard it said many times – you probably have as well – it goes like this: “People live so much longer these days, it’s unreasonable to expect a marriage to last all their life.” Is it true?
Learning Her Love Language: I Discovered My Wife’s Biggest Turn-On
I finally discovered my wife’s biggest turn-on. I must confess I’d never been a fan of Gary Chapman’s book "The 5 Love Languages" before this incident. Initially, the whole concept felt contrived. I wasn’t buying it. That is, until that moment in the kitchen...
What Was It All For?
My father returned from the war with ten quid in his pocket. He’d been flying Spitfires and Hurricanes over Europe and later in Burma. He was invalided out, worn out by what he’d seen and done.
The Politically Incorrect Reality About What Boosts Kids’ Chances for Success
A new book, “The Two-Parent Privilege: How Americans Stopped Getting Married and Started Falling Behind”, shows just how starkly a child’s success in life can be affected based on whether he grows up with married parents or a single parent.
‘To Have and to Hold’: Marrying Young and Making It Last
It’s commonly accepted today that first marriages have a greater success rate when delayed. If we dig a bit deeper, however, we find this conventional wisdom regarding delayed marrying has its flaws. Certain factors are at play in the success of all marriages.
Masculine Men Are Women’s Unsung Heroes
Masculine men are the very thing we need — now more than ever in the battle of traditionalism versus progressivism. Though the media has attacked the vital value of gender itself, we know they’re wrong. We know male and female is how we’re made.
Two Sides to Relationship Repair
Couples who go the distance in marriage are those who have learnt to repair early and often. They still have disagreements, tiffs, and other challenges to their connection, but they catch it before it escalates.
For Marriage and Country
Marriages are always stronger when a couple are looking forward to building a better future together by learning from their mistakes, rather than backward-looking and focused on the past failings of the other.
Resurrecting Our Marriages
Easter Sunday – the high point of the Christian calendar celebrating Christ’s resurrection from the dead. What does this day, this event, have to teach us as married couples?
Hear Me, Touch Me, Know Me
In any relationship, especially in marriage, its strength and quality can be measured by the depth and sincerity of the intimacy we share. For any couple to have sustained and vibrant intimacy, one that increases in depth and meaning, proactive investment is required.
Stonewalling: A Silent Killer in Marriage
Stonewalling – aka ‘the silent treatment’ – is common in many marriages. Never helpful and poorly understood, we ignore it at our risk.
Kiss to Connect
One way that couples can actively build connection and re-establish the excitement of sexual anticipation is through the ‘Connect Kiss’. This simple practice takes a mere 20 seconds a day: ten in the morning and ten in the evening.
Criticism: The Not-So-Silent Killer
Criticism kills. It crushes self-confidence and poisons the trust between us. It also smothers self-growth by directing our energies to the wrong thing – what the other did or said, rather than our internal reaction.
Defending Our Hearts
Defensiveness is a self-protective response to a perceived judgement, criticism, rejection, or risk of future disappointment. While it is a natural reaction, ironically, it rarely protects our hearts.
Keeping Our Eyes on What Matters
Every engaged couple needs to discern their own path. Downsize, divide, delay, or go deluxe – whatever path they decide in this era of uncertainty, the vows they make on their wedding day will be one thing that stays the same.
Be My Valen-time!
Modern relationships are plagued by busyness. And when our relationship is neglected, we often end up arguing during the little time we do spend together. With Valentine’s Day approaching, it’s the perfect opportunity to give the gift of time.
The Lost Art of Forgiveness – The Secret to a Successful Marriage
Paul the apostle warned people that “those who marry will face many troubles in this life”. That’s the reality of marriage. Always has been and always will be.
Resolutions to Have and to Hold
Inherent to the New Year resolution is the idea of becoming a better person. No sane person aspires to drink more or learn how to smoke as a New Year goal. Yet, so many of us fail to create the permanent change in ourselves that we seek. Why is that?
Closing the Gap on Marital Distancing
Why then, when we were in lockdown and spending so much more time together at home, were we not seeing improvements in our marital outcomes? We have a couple of theories...
Bids for Connection
Bids for Connection can include doing a task the other will appreciate but not expect, a word of affirmation or appreciation. They are simple gestures that are an invitation to move forward together.
Marriage on Fire
Every marriage, ours included, has ‘bad fire seasons’. It’s inevitable; when two people commit their lives to each other and then get busy, tired and stressed, we can only expect trouble.
It’s All About Me… Not!
Good social skills teach us to be other-focussed in our conversation and to be attentive to cues from the other about whether we are engaging their interest.
Make Some New Year Resolutions
One of the most important resolutions we can make is to give our marriages and relationships higher priority. The most vital and satisfying marriages are intentional. They don’t leave their relationship to chance, but actively foster habits which deepen their intimacy.
For Better is Important Too
Optimistic couples have learnt that passion and joy in marriage is not always spontaneous but it can be, and needs to be, cultivated. Our hearts long for companionship in both the sorrows and joys of our lives.
Three Keys to a Successful Marriage
Staying married requires a life-long commitment to keep learning. It seems to me that once you think you know it all, you will find you know nothing. Humility is the prerequisite for growth as a person. The same is true for your marriage.
