Andrew Gray is a top bloke. He’s a business and leadership mentor, and I was honoured to recently film an interview with him (more on that in the coming weeks). Andrew is the real deal, and he has a message for the men of Australia: Masculinity Is Not Toxic!

Our forefathers would roll in their graves (and they’d roll their eyes too if they could) if they knew some 21st-century Westerners put ‘toxic’ and ‘masculinity’ in the same sentence. The truth is that healthy masculinity is a marvellous force for good. As best-selling author John Eldredge writes:

“It was men who stopped slavery. It was men who ran up the stairs in the Twin Towers to rescue people. It was men who gave up their seats on the lifeboats of the Titanic. Men are made to take risks and live passionately on behalf of others.”

Most men are good, not ‘toxic’, and are doing their best to make the world a better place. Dads4Kids completely rejects the notion of toxic masculinity. To be fair, bad men do exist, but so do bad women. As friend of Dads4Kids Bettina Arndt so adroitly says: “No gender has a monopoly on vice,” something we would all be wise to remember as we muddle along.

In a YouTube clip from Episode 311 of The Other Side on, Damian Coory makes the case that “boys who are fathered well, or who… overcome absent or bad fathering by themselves, are taught to use their strength for good, to protect women and children.” He argues that, in fact, there is no epidemic of men’s violence today. The latest homicide data from the Australian Institute of Criminology backs Damian up.

Here’s another truth bomb from Andrew Gray: “Men, you have what it takes!” If you are reading this newsletter in a dark place, or if you are feeling discontented with the state of the world, take courage. There is always hope.

Great men like Andrew Gray and organisations like Dads4Kids are here to encourage you. Please reach out to Dads4Kids here if you need support.


Watch Andrew Gray’s Masculinity is NOT Toxic video. Share it with family and friends, and make sure you subscribe to his YouTube Channel too. Andrew and his business partner Glaucco Tomaz (another top bloke, who also happens to be my brother-in-law) are creating great content every week to counter unhelpful mainstream narratives. As Andrew says, other men need what you can bring — please support @andrewgraypodcast if you can!

Yours for Healthy Masculinity,
Nathaniel Marsh

P.S. If you’re encouraged by the work of Dads4Kids and would like to help us continue Building Men, Growing Fathers, and Changing Generations, please consider making a tax-deductible donation here.

P.P.S. Don’t forget this Sunday, 12 May is Mother’s Day! If you haven’t already, make sure you honour your mother, and help your kids to do the same. Visit Daily Dad Mothers if you need some encouragement or inspiration!


Image courtesy of Alena Darmel.

About the Author: Nathaniel Marsh

Operations Manager and Qualified Trainer for Dads4Kids, Nathaniel is passionate to see hearts turn to the Father. As a professional filmmaker, Nat worked in advertising and television for 20 years and has been helping Dads4Kids behind the scenes since 2002. Nat has been married to Jodi since 2004, and they have five daughters.

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