Chatting with my good friend Steve Blizard of Roxburgh Securities, who has worked hard to build a successful investment advisory company, he said something very profound to me as we compared notes about people we had met over the years, “You know Warwick, I am deeply suspicious of men who are all about themselves and their own success. Many of them bankrupt their families and their relationships to gain recognition and money, but in doing so they devalue everything they stand for.”

I know this is true because I have done it myself, and if you promise to keep it a secret I would have to confess that many times I still do it.

Several years ago I welcomed my third son, Israel, home from Sweden. He had been studying at Uppsala University for 5 months on an exchange program. I promised him by email that I would go surfing with him when he got home. As he packed his surfboard into the car on Saturday morning I lamely said, “Catch a tube for me. I’ll go with you next Saturday.” Then I drove to my office to write a Dads4Kids newsletter about Dads spending more time with their children. How hypocritical is that?

The good news is that whilst I am a hypocrite at times, I still hit a few home runs with my family. You need to know that I am just a man like you and I fail regularly, but my goal is to inspire you to put your children first because your children are your future.

Some time ago I was asked to speak at a forum in the NSW State Parliament House on the subject of ‘Family Law – Is Man the Loser?’

The basic argument of my presentation was that when families break up we all lose. The children lose most of all. Litigation between families is always suicidal in more ways than one. The only answer is to discover the power behind a very old-fashioned 4 letter word: L.O.V.E.

Our society is facing massive deficits in government spending, but the greatest deficit we face in our modern age is not a financial deficit but a love deficit.

Neil Young’s song ‘Lotta Love’ could have been written yesterday:

 It’s gonna take a lotta love
To change the way things are.
It’s gonna take a lotta love
Or we won’t get too far. . .

It’s gonna take a lotta love
To get us thru the night.
It’s gonna take a lotta love
To make things work out right.

Our civilisation is going through ‘a dark night of the soul’. We have become civilised barbarians. We are tearing each other apart both individually and collectively.  Where is the flashpoint for collective change? To have collective change we must first have individual change. If your heart as a father can be turned towards your children, you can begin the process of change.

Feminists correctly identified the source of many of society’s problems as coming from men because men are leaders. They either lead badly or goodly. These same feminists misdiagnosed the problem and then demonised the masculine and in doing so threw the baby out with the bath water. The simple answer is healing for the masculine soul.

Germaine Greer, an Australian feminist, wrote a book called, ‘Daddy, We Hardly Knew You’. The book according to the publishers weekly is all about her ‘coming to terms with the love he never gave her’.

Dads4Kids Fatherhood Foundation exists to encourage you in your love for your children. Our hope is that one day, when we are dead and gone, our children will stand up and say, “My daddy loved me!” and not have to write a book complaining about the love they never had.

Lovework

Invest in the future. The future is your children. Loving your children is the key.

This week we ask that you would help us with our End of the Financial Year Appeal and give generously to the Dads4Kids Fatherhood Foundation. We will use your gifts to establish a matched giving fund so that others will give more by matching your donation. All donations are Tax Deductible.

Yours for our children

Warwick Marsh