Last Night I Had a Passenger
April 11, 2005

I’m tired. Last night I had just driven from Coffs Harbour to hold a DIDs (Dads in Distress) meeting in Forster, and returned in the early hours of the morning. I am on the road a lot. My car is my office, often it’s also my dressing room, and often it’s my bedroom.
Often on the long hauls, I find myself talking to a very special passenger. My Lord, my Higher Power, if you like. I find Him sitting there right next to me, and I often just talk to him as I would talk to a mate. It is nice being able to bounce ideas, talk about life, talk about anything, and not have someone return with an answer. Just to listen, not judge or adjudicate. But just to be there, just to listen. Pretty much like we do in a DIDs meeting.
Often I talk to Him about the men who have just shared their stories with me. Often I ask for His help. The miles seem to flitter away, and before I know it, I have arrived safely at my destination. Often I get so caught up in the conversation, pouring out my inner feelings to Him, that I forget where I am.
Often I find myself sitting in the car at a set of lights rattling off my thoughts out loud to my passenger, when I suddenly realise that I am being stared at from the vehicles on either side of me, who are no doubt wondering why I am talking to this empty seat. I quickly fumble for my mobile phone and hold it up, smiling at both vehicles as if to show I have not gone completely mad. I love my passenger, and as much as it’s nice to have other passengers, I also look forward to my times with my special passenger.
When I arrive home, I fumble for the light switch in the dark; I step on a discarded toy my nine-year-old left behind. The light goes on and I’m home, and as my eyes focus on the room, there’s a T-shirt here, a sock there, a bunch of toys over there and a drawing of me by my boy. All the remnants of a weekend with my boy, all that’s left for the next two weeks, until I get to see him again. My passenger is still with me, and He sees what I see, and I say goodnight and thank Him for the safe trip.
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