There was a time when pornography seemed like it was a part of growing up and gaining liberty from stereotypical norms, or rules our parents and religion had imposed on us.

But more than that, it seemed like harmless fun, exciting, and a consequence-free good time.

The First Time

I remember well the first day I saw pornography.  That in itself is telling, because I got bashed around the head in so many accidents when I was younger, that very little from my teenage years and before still exists in my memory.

I was 13 years old, in my first year of high school.  I went to check out what all the fuss was about over in the playground under a tree. And there it was.  One of the kids had stolen his father’s dirty magazine.  I saw my first naked woman.  At the time the images didn’t look real, but they triggered a curiosity that could have had devastating consequences.

Consequences of a $100b Porn Industry

Today we know that what the $97 billion pornography industry puts out is not consequence-free at all.  Some with a vested interest still pretend it is (like smoking tobacco and gambling, I suppose), but more than enough data is around to show the objective observer that porn is far from innocent fun in the long term.  Here are a few headline stats:

• Social Sciences Quarterly found in a 2004 study that “People who admit to having extramarital affairs were over 300% more likely to admit consuming porn than those who have never had an affair”. [1]
• A study of 14- to 19-year-old teenagers found that females who consumed pornographic videos were at a significantly greater likelihood of being victims of sexual harassment or sexual assault. [2]
• A Swedish study of 18-year-old males found that frequent users of pornography were significantly more likely to have sold and bought sex than other boys of the same age [3]

Pornography does have consequences.  Those first pictures I saw back in the 1980s were ‘just’ naked and semi-naked woman.  But today, the starting point for pornography is much further along.

In the 1980’s, I went through my teenage years without seeing anything more than naked woman and the occasional sex scene in a movie.  Today, the escalation from first viewing a nude person to soul-destroying and even illegal material can be just a matter of hours.

A Savage Progression

The typical type of pornography viewed today is much more savage, and it is getting worse by the day:

• A Google Trends analysis indicates that searches for “Teen Porn” have more than tripled between 2005–2013. Total searches for teen-related porn reached an estimated 500,000 daily in March 2013 — one-third of total daily searches for pornographic websites. [4]
• Of the 304 scenes analysed, 88.2% contained physical aggression, principally spanking, gagging, and slapping. Perpetrators of aggression were usually male, whereas targets of aggression were overwhelmingly female. [5]
• A Google search for ‘bestiality’ generated 2.7 million returns. [6]

Yet for all the jaw-dropping statistics, each number represents more than a single person, because porn has many victims.  There are no winners in the porn industry.  Not the consumers, not the spouses of the consumers, not their children, not the actors (whether voluntary or forced), not the tax-collecting government and not even the producers who rake in the cash.  In the long run, everyone loses.

But this blog and podcast is not a soap-box spiel about the evils of porn.  It is really about you and me, and about one man who came out of the abyss that porn was dragging him deeper into.

One Man’s Victory

On this episode of Real Talk for Real Men, we have a man who knows all about the damage pornography can do from an end user’s perspective.

Luke Gibbons was deep in a porn addiction that had him in a scarcely believable straitjacket that was ruining his life.

Luke would spend whole Saturdays on pornography, sometimes up all night and going to work on just a single hour’s sleep.  He stopped socialising, even missing parties.  His pornography addiction was literally consuming his life.

“You have two Gods.  There is the God of sex and the other God that you want to serve.
You have to decide which one is going to be your God.”
– rehab counsellor

Today though, he has overcome it.  Luke Gibbons has been restored.

But not really just one man, because what was a ripple effect of damage emanating from his porn habit, is today a wave of victories that see Luke in a happy permanent relationship and in a career and life purpose that is a far cry from the abyss of his previous life.

To hear Luke’s story, you can stream episode #43 below or subscribe through iTunes, Google Play, Android, PodBean, or Spotify.

What You Will Learn from Luke’s Story

Luke is brutally honest and vulnerable in what he shares with you.  Here are some of the things you will learn about in this podcast:

> Luke shares why ‘trying harder’ just does not work when you are in a porn addiction.

> What is the first place to start when dealing with a porn addiction with yourself or someone else.

> Learn what and how to get to the root of the pornography addiction.

> How pornography is not always so much about sex, but how pornography is used to medicate a pain in your life.

> What pornography does to the human brain.

> Even if the pornography is not yet ‘bad’, it is having an effect on you, your family and future generations.

> Why the underlying baggage that goes along with a porn addiction requires a lot longer than it takes to break ordinary ‘bad habits.’

> Why you are still at risk during recovery, even after you have stopped porn, and get

> A special coupon that you can use to get a discount on the porn-breaking video series that Luke says is the best program around for defeating porn.

“Pornography takes you further than you want to go and makes you stay longer than you want to stay.”
– Luke Gibbons

Listen to Luke’s story and share it with your friends:

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