Some parents worry that too much nurture can make children co-dependent. But the risk of too little is worse. You won’t believe what love and nurture does to your child’s brain.

“I wish I hadn’t cuddled my babies so much,” said no mother, ever!

It’s probably one piece of parenting advice I’m glad I didn’t take. Amongst the dozens and dozens of parenting books I read, some parenting ‘experts’ claimed that holding your baby too much would lead to co-dependent, whiny kids.

I remember lying with him next to me in his little bassinet the morning after my first baby was born. This advice was ringing in my ears – the last thing I wanted was a co-dependent whiny kid. And yet there he was, this much anticipated, already much loved little one. I couldn’t resist.

I pulled him out of his bassinet and lay him on my chest. He seemed to fit there just right, and as he nuzzled in peacefully, all that parenting ‘advice’ went out the window. At that moment, I realised that at the end of the day, I need to trust my instincts more than anyone’s opinion – no matter how many books they’ve written.

I don’t have co-dependent, whiny kids.

I often look back over each day at bedtime and wonder whether I’ve achieved much of note. Sure, the kids are fed and watered but have I made a difference in their lives?

Then I read this article about just how vital the love and affection of a mother really is. To summarise the message of the article, take a look at the difference between the brain of a loved child and the brain of a neglected child:

Just by making eye contact, giving hugs and positively interacting with your kids, you make a profound, life-long lasting impact on them. Well done, fellow parents!

Originally published at Mum Daily. Image by Fakurian Design at Unsplash.