Let’s face it: relationships are not easily maintained. The truth is that minimal problems cause significant issues.

Catch the foxes for us, the little foxes that spoil the vineyards, for our vineyards are in blossom.” (Song of Solomon 2:15)

Foxes get into a vineyard and nibble at the roots of precious, longstanding grape vines.

Let’s round them up. Let’s go “fox hunting.” Here is my experience with how to remove the five “little foxes” that are eating my relationships up:

1. Strife

The constant bickering is a “little fox.” It can appear harmless, but it is eating away at the love in a relationship.

Arguing and quarrelling is a habit. You get used to “crossing swords” over kids, money, food, responsibilities, etc.

Blessed are the peacemakers.” Each quarrel and fight is destructive. If you have issues to resolve, set a time and place where the outcome is positive.

2. Jealousy

Looking at someone else’s fortune or possessions with coveting is dangerous. It wants what other people have.

Why did I not get that job, that car, that home?” “I worked harder than they did, and they got the promotion?”

Those emotions caused Cain to kill his brother Abel.  Saul “eyed” David because the women were singing about David slaying Goliath, and Saul was irked by it.

Remember, “God can bless you and someone else at the same time.” Rejoice when friends are blessed. God has a great blessing for you as well!

3. Anger

Inner frustration is like a pot ready to boil over. “Fits of rage” can explode on the road or in the kitchen.

Out of nowhere comes a torrent of words, accusations, or uncontrolled hostility, even toward a wife, children, or good friend.

Your reactions start to scare people. It’s time for a deep soul-searching. It’s time to recognise patterns of rage you saw in your parents or siblings.

Deal with anger before it costs you everything. Get help, get counselling, and be honest about your reactions. No one should have to live with an unpredictable friend, father or spouse.

4. Ambition

This fourth little “fox” is self-seeking and selfish. It is always “climbing the ladder” and self-promoting. It is very political and never thinks of serving others.

Nothing destroys relationships like ambition. A person wants a relationship but seems more interested in how you can further their cause.

Set aside your ambitions and “seek to serve.”

5. Division

Division is the last “little fox.” It is when two persons or parties divide, divorce, and become entrenched in contrary opinions.

Feuds like this can last for months or years. Everyone gets hurt.

Refuse to remain divided.

Discuss your differences, but do not allow them to bring a “parting of the ways.” Apologise, stay humble, pliable, and teachable. Most of all, choose the relationship over the opinion.

You can catch these “little foxes” of strife, jealousy, anger, ambition, and division.

Let’s go “fox hunting”… and save the whole vineyard.

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Republished with thanks to Larry Stockstill. Image courtesy of Unsplash.

About the Author: Larry Stockstill

Larry Stockstill is a veteran pastor, author, and mentor with over five decades of ministry experience. He served as Lead Pastor of Bethany Church in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, for 28 years, where he pioneered small group models and led a missions movement that gave over $63 million to global and local outreach. He is the founder of the Surge Project, which has planted over 22,000 rural churches in twelve world zones. His books, including The Cell Church, The Remnant, and Model Man, have equipped pastors and leaders worldwide. Now serving as a teaching pastor under his son at Bethany Church, Larry also leads Pastors University, distilling his top leadership lessons from 50 years of ministry. He continues to mentor leaders globally with a focus on generational impact, integrity, and legacy. Larry and his wife, Melanie, have been married for 48 years. They have six children — most in ministry — and nineteen grandchildren.

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